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Section 24
Using
Simple Requests Effectively
Question
24 found at the bottom of this page
Answer
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The problem with simple requests is that they are not so simple. Requests
to children can be made more or less effective by a teacher's tone of voice, the
spontaneity of the request and the phrasing of the demand. It has been said that
over 90 percent of what we communicate is done non-verbally through body language
and tone. Several pieces of advice may be helpful.
Watch
that voice! We all have different voices. The voice we're concerned about
here is often called our "nagging voice." The nagging voice has a quality
of "You're not doing what I expect and it's really irritating and what's
the matter with you and when are you going to learn..." etc. Nagging voice
has an aggravated and anxious tone that most children themselves find irritating.
When this tone of voice is coupled with a request, therefore, it makes cooperation
less likely because you are now asking an angry child to cooperate.
A
good antidote to the nagging voice is a businesslike, matter-of-fact presentation.
"John, it is now time to start your work," or "Taylor, line up."
This tone of voice implies, "You may not like this but it's got to be done
now." Testing is much less likely when requests are made in a matter-of-fact
way, but-believe it or not-the mere tone of voice can also say, "If you test
or push me, you'll get counted."
Keep requests short.
Keeping the request short (three words or less) can also encourage compliance.
With some students using one-step directions with as few words as possible can
make all the difference. What might happen, for example if Tricia, who has oppositional
behavior to begin with, hears this request: "Now Tricia, I want you to stop
talking, pick up your things, and move to the back table. I have had enough of
your disruptions. Maybe your sitting away from the group will help"? Tricia
is not likely to follow along, because the wordiness of the teacher's request
is confusing and invites a power struggle. It may be easier for this little girl
to argue with the teacher and end up in time out than to try to sort out the long,
convoluted direction she was just given.
A better approach
would be for the teacher to say, "Tricia, back table." After all, the
teacher's goal is to minimize the disruption. If Tricia moves, the talking will
cease. Someone else can bring her materials or Tricia may surprise you and do
that automatically.
Spontaneity is dangerous. Although
often unavoidable, the spontaneity of a request can also be a cooperation killer.
Let's say that music was cancelled for the day but you forgot to note that on
the posted schedule. The students were looking forward to music at 1:00, but when
that time comes, you let them know that, instead of going to music, it is time
to clean out their desks. The students moan, groan and complain.
No
one likes spur-of-the-moment interruptions that involve unpleasant tasks. You
don't like them either, but you are often stuck with such intrusions. But we're
not talking about getting you to cooperate here; we're talking about getting your
pupils to cooperate. And we're also not saying children shouldn't have jobs to
do. They should help out around the classroom. The point is this: Try to structure
tasks so that spontaneous requests are seldom necessary. In the situation just
mentioned, it would have been helpful to make the change (music to desk cleaning)
on the schedule at the beginning of the day so students could get used to the
idea of desk cleaning rather than having it "sprung" on them at the
last minute.
Effective phrasing. Finally, the phrasing
of a request can also make a difference in how kids respond. Phrasing a request
as a question and adding the often ridiculous "we" to the statement
will often insure noncompliance or testing and manipulation. A super-sweet "Don't
we think it's about time to start our work?" for example, is almost guaranteed
to elicit a negative response. In general it is very dangerous to make requests
in the form of a question. "Do you want me to call your parents?" or
"Do you want to stay after school today?" might receive a "Yes"
from a provocative and oppositional student. A better way of phrasing the work
question would be, "I want your journal entry complete by lunchtime."
What
if, in spite of everything, your simple request still does no good? We'll come
back to that question after we've discussed several other Start behavior options.
-
Phelan PhD, Thomas and Sarah Jane Schonour, MA, "1-2-3 Magic for Teachers:
Effective Classroom Discipline Pre-K through Grade 8", ParentMagic, Inc:
Illinois, 2004.
Personal
Reflection Exercise #10
The preceding section contained information
about using simple requests effectively. Write three case study examples regarding
how you might use the content of this section in your practice.
QUESTION
24
What are four ways to make simple requests more effective? Record
the letter of the correct answer the Answer
Booklet.
Answer
Booklet for
this course
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25
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