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Section 18
Primal
Beliefs about Anger
Question
18 found at the bottom of this page
Answer
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Our beliefs and information-processing systems
play a decisive role in determining our feelings and behavior.
We interpret and misinterpret signals from others according to our values, rules,
and beliefs. When we overemphasize the significance of personal success, or national
superiority, we slip into the trap of regarding individual competitors, members
of outgroups, or citizens of other nations as less worthy than ourselves. Primitive
mechanisms for processing information, retained from our evolutionary experience,
prejudice our judgments about people who differ from us. Cognitive biases may
also lead us to indiscriminately attribute malice to anyone whose actions or beliefs
conflict with ours. As the vise of our cognitive apparatus tightens, we tend to
squeeze these people into the Enemy category: the angry spouse, the member of
a religious or racial minority, the outspoken political revolutionary. It becomes
increasingly difficult to observe others reflectively, objectively, and with perspective.
The
predilection to become excessively or inappropriately angry and violent
may be understood in terms of this primal thinking. The patterns
are primal not only in the sense of being basic but also because they probably
originate in primordial times, when they would have been useful to our animal
and human ancestors in dealing with dangerous problems with other individuals
or groups.
People generally believe that their anger is their
first response to an offense; their initial interpretation preceding their angry
response, however, is so rapid and often so subtle that they may not be aware
of it. Upon reflection and introspection, however, they can almost recognize that
their initial emotional response is a distressed feeling rather than anger. With
training, they can generally "catch" the meaning of an event leading
to their distress.
The hostility sequence thus proceeds
from the interpretation of a transgression to anger and then to hostile verbal
or physical action. For many years I believed that the anger followed immediately
after the interpretation of being wronged. Several years ago, however, I observed
that patients who focused on their feelings following a noxious experience noted
a fleeting hurt or anxious feeling before they experienced anger. Close examination
revealed the common theme leading to the distress that preceded the experience
of anger: the perception of being diminished in some way. If the individual evaluates
this distress as wrongfully caused by another person, his behavioral system is
mobilized in preparation for counterattack. A simplified version of the stages
in the development of hostility can be represented in this diagram:
EVENT
- DISTRESSED - "WRONGED" - ANGER = MOBILIZE TO ATTACK
If
we perceive that a threat or loss is simply due to an impersonal situation-for
example, sickness or an economic crisis-we feel upset or unhappy but not angry.
If we conclude that some person or group is at fault, however, then we feel angry
and are impelled to retaliate to undo the wrong. We may even feel angry at an
inanimate object when we feel that it is unfairly impinging on us (such as a chair
that shouldn't be there, or a glass that shouldn't have fallen from our grip).
Our subjective feeling ranges in quality and intensity from being miffed to being
enraged. Although the term "anger" is often used in common parlance
to express not only a person's feeling but also his or her destructive behavior,
I reserve the term simply for the feeling. I will use the term "hostile aggression"
to refer to the behavior.
When we are mobilized to
fight or to counterattack, we may inhibit our actions out of concern for the consequences.
Nonetheless, as long as our image of the transgressor persists, our biological
attack systems remain activated, expressed physiologically by an increase in the
heart rate, a rise in blood pressure, and growing tension of the muscles. Our
mobilization to fight also includes our display of intimidating facial expressions,
such as scowling and staring.
Problems arise in interpersonal
relations when we misinterpret or exaggerate what seems to be a transgression.
Say we believe that somebody has disparaged us, deceived us, or challenged a cherished
value. This violation rouses us to counterattack in order to terminate the damage
and punish the offender. We all have specific vulnerabilities that predispose
us to overreact to situations that impinge on them. These vulnerable areas actually
consist of problematic beliefs, such as, "If somebody doesn't show respect,
it means I appear weak," or, "If my wife doesn't express appreciation
to me, it means she doesn't care," or, "If my spouse rejects me, I am
helpless."
To protect ourselves from discrimination,
coercion, injustice, and abandonment, we construct rules regarding equality, freedom,
fairness, and rejection. If we perceive that we are receiving unfair treatment
or that our freedom is curtailed, not only are we diminished by it, but we become
vulnerable to further disparagement. We may seek to retaliate and punish the violator,
even if we have not sustained any damage, in order to reinstate the balance of
power. Whether we have been damaged or not, we determine the nature of the offense,
weigh the pros and cons of desired retaliation, and decide on what form of remedial
action to take.
We use these formulas to monitor and evaluate
our interpersonal transactions, but because they are exaggerated and rigid they
lead to unnecessary distress. Faulty beliefs are embedded in a network of self-protective
compensatory demands: "People must show me respect," or, "My wife
should consistently demonstrate she cares." If these injunctions are violated,
then another set of coercive retaliatory beliefs is activated. "I should
punish anybody who doesn't show me respect," or, "I should withdraw
from my wife if she is not responsive." Beliefs that protect what we consider
vital to our existence or our identity assume a primal form, such as, "Somebody
who slurs my honor is my enemy."
The primal beliefs
are often extreme and can lead to violence. Hank, a construction worker
who believed, "If somebody doesn't show respect, I should beat him up,"
got into a number of fights on the job, at bars, and at other social gatherings.
Sometimes he extended the same rule to his wife and struck her when she scolded
him. One such event led to his entry into couples' therapy, where he recognized
that his sense of vulnerability underlay his drive to preserve his macho image
at all costs. When he realized that giving in to his impulse to hurt people was
generally regarded as a sign of weakness, not strength, he was more motivated
to control his behavior. We have found clinically that a number of abusive people
have a defective image of themselves, for which they compensate by attempting
to intimidate others.
- Beck, Aaron T., Prisoners of Hate, HarperCollins:
New York, 1999.
=================================
Personal
Reflection Exercise #4
The preceding section contained information
about primal beliefs determining feelings and behavior. Write three case study
examples regarding how you might use the content of this section in your practice.
QUESTION
18
When threats are perceived as impersonal one feels upset or unhappy,
but if one concludes that some person or group is at fault, how does one tend
to feel? Record the letter of the correct answer the Answer
Booklet.
Answer
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